STAGES OF LIFE: AS TOLD THROUGH SOCIAL MEDIA

Social media is everywhere. On our phones, on our computers, on our watches, on our TVs, in our cars, in the office, on every website, on QR codes hanging from any and all surface areas, on voice activated home assistants, etc. And it comes in many different forms. There’s professional social media, flaunt social media, rant social media, unprofessional / expressive social media, discussion social media, evidence will last forever social media, and evidence only lasts as long as you specify social media. So many options, there’s a platform for everyone!

One of my new favorite hobbies is to ask strangers what their most used social media app is and try to guess their general age range. In my head, of course, because there are certainly outliers to this data set. Like with all good, non-research conducted, totally opinionated based on the researcher’s experiences, non-scientifically backed in any way studies. Also, that would be rude if I just blurted it out. Especially if it was wrong, or if they’re embarrassed, or if they don’t want everyone in Bed, Bath, and Beyond knowing their age.

For all of my introverted readers, you’re probably melting at the thought of participating in this hobby. That’s fine, it’s not for everyone. But, I have learned some interesting things that I can share with you. Without any need for social interaction on your part. Let’s examine some data I found / collected / assumed about the 9 most common social platforms that people use today (*NOTE: zero part of this has actually been researched and all information presented is my take on life):

TikTok

Pre-COVID: primarily used by Gen Z and hard-core judged by millennials and beyond

COVID: everyone has lost all shame, and concern for Chinese spies, and are now participating

Post-COVID: TBD, but this won’t be the first thing I throw out when we get through this mess

Snapchat

Concentrated in Gen Z and younger millennials. The point system is attractive to our senses of controlling our destiny on the leaderboard of life.

Instagram

Popularized by millennials, acquired by Gen Z, being slowly introduced into Gen Alpha, and containing some forward-thinking Baby Boomers, or people who want to keep up with their younger family members.

Pinterest

Mainly a female social media. Think Instagram meets LinkedIn meets your dreams. It’s an organizer’s online dream and can help you constantly see what you want, in a way that doesn’t involve back-door bragging.

Reddit

The most obscure of the generational breakdown. Reddit kind of appeals to anyone who likes to argue, or put their two cents into any conversation, anonymously. 

Twitter

Outside on Gen Z influencers, Twitter tends to be primarily centered on Baby Boomers and Millennials. Like a modern day newspaper where you can just express yourself, in 280 characters or less, with lots of judgement from all other Twitter users.

Facebook

As we start to phase out even millennials, we begin to question the longevity of this platform. Messenger brought forth a resurgence in “usage” among us young people, but is that really Facebook? No, it’s a chat application that uses your profile picture for convenience and probably data sharing reasons.

LinkedIn

Social is a stretch – professional media feels more appropriate. If you work and are college age and older, you better be on LinkedIn. It’s where you can show how qualified, or unqualified depending on your profile, you are to get paid. Be warned, though, this is not the place to post puppy pictures or talk about your love for Friends. Which is overrated and, like Harry Potter, had it’s time. 

Email

If you answer email as your favorite social app, you clearly are a dinosaur. Email is not a social platform. It is a professional way to communicate with internal and external clients in the workplace. Also to confirm your online shopping orders and track the shipment to know when you have to put pants on and open the door. There is no other use.

There you have it! The stages of life as told through social media. So if you’re crushing your TikTok and Insta game right now and think you’ll never in a million years stop caring about what all of your followers think about you, well, maybe think again. The evidence is quite clear. We will all end up on email forwarding chain mail to our friends and family at some point. 

Alright, jumping off my pedestal for now. If you know someone who would enjoy this post and want to share it with them, that would be awesome. Sharing is caring, after all. Don’t forget to subscribe to get these in your inbox twice weekly and follow TRP on Twitter for frequent musings. Thanks for reading!


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